Tony Spunk is a Sex God

Saturday night something extremely weird happened. Something unexpected but that had to happen eventually, judging by the business I’m in and the law of averages. Yes my people, Antonio Spunk III had a threesome, with two lovely ladies from Nebraska. A guy gets lonely, what can I tell you and when opportunity lands in your lap it would be cruel to turn it down, no?

I know what you’re thinking; that’s an oxymoron of sorts, “lovely ladies” and “Nebraska” but you’d be wrong. These gals were quite the hotties. Well if you squinted a bit and made sure you were toasted. I mean they looked kinda like something The Hef discarded in the ’70s, their bodies were still top notch, grade A bazoomba but the faces were a little on the “mood lighting” setting.

One of them, Marina, was a little odd looking facially. Like she’d been stretched sideways and stapled. Just her face though, nothing important. Her boobs were like exercise balls. Definitely silicon, but still fun to de-stress with and she had a tiny ass, which normally ain’t the Spunk’s thing but it was given a pass due to the stylish beach balls she kept up top. It just amazed me she managed to walk upright most of the time. Fascinating.

The other gal was called Irene and she was younger but no less “worn-in” – maybe mid-thirties or thereabouts. She was a “supersized lady” let’s call her, and I ain’t averse to supersizing, no sir. She was kind of like the Michelin man only with bigger honkers and Spanx. Her ass was like a huge, rippled balloon after you let some of the air out and it goes kinda wrinkly and droopy. Hours of fun can be had with that ass although enormous and firm is really the ideal. Hell, Tony Spunk is not Adonis so I don’t really give two shits if a lady ain’t a perfect ten.

Marina quit early, she wasn’t all that into it really, once the Martini wore off, when she suddenly remembered something she had to do and left without her panty hose. But honestly, that was the best part. Because that Irene, let me tell you. I’d love to see that gal on a mechanical bull because I have a feeling she could go the distance. There was plenty to get hold of I assure you and all was splendid apart from a small mishap where I mistook a fatty fold of flesh for…well we won’t get into it, but it could happen to anyone.

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10 Responses to Tony Spunk is a Sex God

  1. Poobomber says:

    Did you roll her in flour and look for the wet spot before you did anything?

    No, no you didn’t. And now look what happened. Embarrassment ensued.

  2. Tony Spunk says:

    Bro, this might be the first time Tony’s been speechless.

  3. Wow. I was going to say something but I can’t follow up Poobomber’s comment. Wow.

  4. Tony Spunk says:

    Mr. Reviewer and Doc – I have to concur. That was a comment shutter-upper if I ever heard one. I don’t even understand it. Tony’s a virginal guy, you dig?

  5. katrocket says:

    hahahahahahahahaha Poob

    it’s magic! All of it.

  6. katrocket says:

    Oh, hey Tony – is this you selling beds in my country?

  7. […] Other people’s comments on other people’s pages: Not that Spunky boy isn’t fabulous and all, but I think this little nugget might have eclipsed his post… Kudos goes out to Poobomber for this little piece of gold. […]

  8. Tony Spunk says:

    Ms. Kat – Honey that guy is a two bit cow poker. Tony would sell beds with a little pizazz, you dig? Lots of sparkle and candlelight and maybe some scantily clad babes lounging around on them purring.

    Mel – Tony is still very much afraid of the Poobomber’s comment. I’m pretty sure it gave me nightmares. Or wet dreams. I haven’t decided which yet.

  9. Poobomber says:

    Haha, I had no idea my little comment would be such a hit!

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